I thought I remembered what it was like living with a kitten.
The last kitten I had was over 30 years ago. All I remembered was soft purring and gentle cuddles.
Instead, I adopted a one-pound martian on crack who does the moonwalk on my keyboard.
Elsa’s been here less than two weeks and somehow runs the ranch like she’s the new sheriff in town.
Trust me, there’s a dark side to kittens the catfood commercials don’t show…
🐾 The claws and tiny teeth. My hands look like I wrestled a barbed-wire fence.
🐾 The litterbox. How a creature this darling can produce fumes strong enough to pollute an entire zip code is beyond science. God bless the litter genie. It keeps that stench under wraps.
🐾 The litter tracking. I’ve swept more this week than I did the whole first year we moved to the dust bowl. So far I’ve bought 2 litter mats and I’m about to grab a third.
🐾 The cords. Every electrical item is now a potential chew toy. I can’t leave my curling iron or hairdryer out. Same thing with charging cables. One minute she’s in my lap. The next minute she’s dangling midair from my phone cord like a circus performer.
🐾 Gravity. Every cup now needs a lid unless I want chaos on my desk. I had to rearrange all my tchotchkes to make room for Elsa’s leaping parkour antics.
🐾 Dogs. If the dogs wander into her little sanctuary, I have to scoop her food immediately. Because Cochise has discovered I keep “snacks” on the floor. Luckily the canines and the feline are fascinated with each other…especially Cochise. Winston isn’t quite sure what this fluffball is all about and he’s not taking any chances.
🐾 Walking. Kittens are fast and unpredictable. Elsa teleports from one side of the room to the other. I’ve nearly tripped over her a dozen times. She’s oblivious. After all, it’s her world. I’m just her caretaker.
🐾 Fresh water. It turns out Elsa was right about that stupid kitty water fountain. Apparently cats prefer moving water to drink. And the more they drink, the less chance of bladder issues. So she’s getting her wish. It should arrive next week.
I could go on, but suffice to say Elsa has turned my world upside down in the most wonderful way.
Even with all the adapting during the busiest season of the year, getting her has been so worth it. I’m loving the kitty mom life.
But for now, I’m off to reset my keyboard for the 87th time before she turns my fonts into ancient hieroglyphics.
Keep it rodeo,
Lorrie “Lo” Morgan 🐾
